This message may not be for you, but you know someone who really needs it, so please share. This week we’re Off Balance On Purpose, defeating despair.

Have you noticed there’s a lot of despair and defeat in this world? And the reason, I think, is that even though those are both terrible experiences, they are easier in some ways than the alternatives.

If you are in despair, then you’re the victim and in need of comfort and assistance. And once defeated, hey, you’ve already lost, so there’s very little left at stake. But accepting these conditions as your “norm,” even slightly, simultaneously paralyzes your progress and absolves you of responsibility.

So how do you escape the dungeon of defeat and despair? Here are three vital steps.

1. Accept Yourself. Own your messed up origin story, the pain and love experienced, tragedies and victories, mistakes and flaws, and the damage done by your past. Been there. Done that. And guess what? You’re still here. You are not your worst mistakes and darkest moments. You are a conscious and capable, amazing human being. Accept it.

2. Love Yourself. As you are. Move from acceptance to affection. You are, after all, your longest, constant companion. Think of all you’ve been through with you! And you can’t give away what you don’t have. So, when you genuinely choose to love yourself, your capacity to love others also increases, and you’ll treat everyone differently, starting with you.

3. Improve Yourself. You are enough and lovable now, and yet constantly improving, in countless ways. Start where you are, making consistently better choices, taking the harder road for right reason, and acting on what you do control.

I didn’t say these were easy steps. But hey, you’re already here in this life. Your one life. And you are your closest friend, your tragic hero, and the flawed, yet lovable star of your story. You are worthy of redemption, deserving of forgiveness, and capable of the extraordinary. So accept yourself, love yourself, and improve yourself. Because a better you means a better world. And until next week, stay Off Balance On Purpose.

The audio for this week’s coaching video is located under the “Get Inspired” tab in the Positive Playlist . You can subscribe to the podcast and listen to other weekly messages for improving all aspects of your life.