Each day gives us the power to choose – what we will do, how we will think, and with whom we will interact. But let’s face it. Sometimes we just have to deal with the circumstances and personalities that are thrust before us.
Some people naturally add to their environment. They exude energy and uplift those they encounter. We strive to be these kinds of people, contributing to our world and our relationships while offering solutions to the challenges we face.
But some people suck. That is, they suck energy. Instead of contributing to creative ideas, they seek to undermine their success. Instead of seeing positive possibilities, they only promote pessimism. They perpetuate problems. They don’t solve them.
We may work with these people. We may live with these people. Were it our choice, we would avoid them, but we cannot. So how do you “deal” with difficult people?
Don’t combat negativity. Diffuse it.
First, you must understand you can’t win at their game. They have way too much experience, and it’s not the game you want to play, anyway. As the saying goes, “Never wrestle with a pig. You’ll both get dirty and the pig likes it.” In other words, you cannot create a positive solution from a negative current. Negative people feed off of conflict, confrontation, cynicism, sarcasm, and other low-level emotional states. These people “vibrate” at a frequency of irritation. Your only course is to change the channel – the polarity of the relationship. Re-tune the dial to a higher frequency. Here are some tips that will help you.
We don’t always get to choose our companions on the roads of life. But we can, mile by mile, choose to build better relationships, even with those who are difficult.
I love the strategy “don’t combat negativity, diffuse it.” That’s a keeper. In fact, I like your entire 6 point methodology and will incorporate it in my relationships.
Thanks Eric. I greatly appreciate the positive encouragement, as well as the Twitter share!
Very inspiring…I know quite a few friends who need to utilize this right about now!
Excellent! Spread the love. Just be sure to tell your friends that you don’t consider them part of the “difficult” demographic. Otherwise, it could definitely backfire!
Good points all. “Expect a positive outcome” is consistent with the way I’ve observed you dealing with people. Thanks for sharing these.
You’re most welcome, Van. Expect the best and it’s amazing how people help prove you right!
Well said! This reminder is perfectly timed – the universe at work. I’ve never heard the saying about wrestling with a pig…Good one!